Funny Poetry: “Oh, My Sausage!” by Gary R. Hess

This funny poem is the first of several food-related poems I have been writing lately. There’s something truly American about the love of greasy, oversized hunks of protein. Nonetheless, food doesn’t have to be serious. This, like many of the others I have been writing, includes a bit of humor to go along with it. If you aren’t a total dingleberry, you probably even guessed what the poem might elude by just looking at the title.

Of course, even with the euphemisms throughout, it isn’t meant to be all that sexual. This poem is truly about my love of sausages and how I just can’t get enough of them.

OH, MY SAUSAGE! by Gary R. Hess

Dear sausage,
Your wondrous length
has beauty and sensuality
that only you provide.
You bring men to their knees
and open their mouth wide
for you to enter freely.

And when they’re done
you come out softly
for you know
we’ll be back for more
and ask for your gooey toppings.

Gary R. Hess

Gary was born and raised on a small farm in rural Kansas. Today, he is teaching various nationalities English in Southeast Asia. Get his newest poetry eBook here.